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To whom it may concern,

As an easy-going guy with marginal intelligence, a great sense of humour, arguably the perfect dad bod, and an abundance of modesty, I think you should strongly consider sending me a message.

I have a very diverse skillset, including but not limited to: being nearly 6 feet tall, proficient hand-holder, masterful Wordle player, fantasy book facts that you don’t care about, and my Grandma once told me that I’m handsome.

Below is my list of qualifications for your review:

Generic Self-description:

5’11, 170ish lbs, blonde hair, blue eyes, slim/athletic
Quiet but not shy. Unless you start teasing, because then words don't work anymore.
I’m a simple guy. I like movies, video games, books and sports. Sue me.
Big fan of golfing in the summer (wow pick a more boring sport, doofus)
Reading is kind of my nerdy secret so promise not to tell anyone, okay? Love getting lost in a big fantasy series.
Tendency to create bad puns and then laugh at them even when you don’t.

Kinky Characteristics:
Bondage - tie my hands up while we cuddle or leave me hogtied for hours - both sound fun.
Tease and Denial - Big fan of being teased. The denial part doesn't sound as nice, but I guess that isn't up to me.
Orgasm Control - Kind of goes with the teasing and denying.
Service/Tasks - A big part of kink for me is making my partner happy. I'd love to do things that make your life easier, or give you a laugh, or just because you said so.
Spanking/Impact - I think a bit of *** could be fun.
Collars sound great, would love to wear one someday.
Curious about pegging and chastity.
Open-minded about trying most kinks.
I am almost more interested in hearing YOUR fantasies. Part of the excitement for me is not knowing what you’re going to think of next. Not to say that I want you to do all the work – I understand that I need to communicate and contribute too. The thought of combining our interests to create a fun dynamic for both us sounds amazing to me

Hard Limits:
Toilet/scat - just not for me
Extreme / - ouch
*d bi/cuckolding

What I'm Looking For:**
Ideally, I want to find someone to connect with and start an IRL relationship. I want someone I can talk and laugh with everyday, to take on dates and watch movies, to hang out and go on adventures with. Honestly, I'd be happy to just talk and get to know some people and see where things go.
If you’re looking for something more on the casual side, I’d be happy to give it a try. I’m not really looking for online though, would need to be somewhat local.
I would like to swap pictures once we're both comfortable doing so. No rush, but I think it's important to know what each other looks like. Just need to confirm that you're not secretly some hairy dude.
Obviously the BDSM dynamic is partially what I’m looking for, otherwise I wouldn’t be posting here. More importantly though, is someone that I can really connect with on a personal level.
I would prefer someone between the ages of 20-32. This isn't a hard limit though. If you're slightly outside that, I could make an exception for the right person.
I cannot stress this enough, but you must be a 6ft tall Amazon Goddess whose only purpose is to fulfill my every fantasy. You need to make enough *** to support us both so that I don't have to work or do anything. My only job is to be submissive and that should be enough to satisfy you. On top of that, you should also be able to tell that I am joking.

Thank you for reading, I look forward to conversing with you presently.

Regards,

Kellanved4