Dear Molly,
I have long had fantasies about vampires and also am drawn to people who have that gothic look. It's part of me that I have hidden for a long time. Since discovering BDSM and the BDSM community, my eyes have opened to what might be possible, so I'm very interested in exploring *** play. I'm drawn to *** but in the sense of bleeding from the skin, not menstrual ***. I don't know a lot about *** play or even if it is a thing, but I want to try and find someone who might be willing to explore this with me. Do you think this is normal, or am I alone in these desires?
Shadow
Dear Shadow,
So let's start with the most important thing right away. Your interest in various aspects of *** play is completely normal, although I dislike the word 'normal' because it feels judgemental, especially when it comes to sex and relationships. So, I prefer to look at different kinks which might not be as familiar or mainstream as others. Concerning your *** play desires being reasonable, and if they can be achieved safely and consensually, the answer is an absolute yes.
There are many types of *** play or play that can lead to *** play. For example, spanking or flogging someone until their skin is red, then using something like Vampire Gloves (or Vampire Mitts) just enough to break the skin's surface will cause bleeding. Also, knife play, needle play and various cutting can all include elements of *** play.
Lots of people worry that *** play means damaging or cutting the skin, but that's not always the case. If you know what you're doing, you can draw *** with the tiniest of nicks in the skin. Many people enjoy the act of making someone bleed or bleeding for someone. I know, as it's something I enjoy myself. There's a massive thrill in seeing my ***, and getting it on my hands and face is also a big turn on for me. The key is to explore various things and work out what works for you.
Of course, one of the most important things when it comes to *** play is doing it safely. *** is a huge risk factor when it comes to spreading germs and should always be treated with caution. Ingesting someone else's *** can put you at risk of catching any ***-borne pathogens, including HIV and various strains of Hepatitis. As a result, you should always be very cautious about ingesting someone's *** and certainly never contemplate it with someone you're not fluid-bound with and are not 100% sure of their STI status.
Besides, whenever you break someone's skin, you're potentially exposing them to an increased risk of getting an infection, so good hygiene is of utmost importance. Cleaning the skin with a mild antiseptic beforehand reduces the risk of any bacteria being able to get into the ***stream. Ensure any implements you use are kept scrupulously clean and if possible, disinfected between use. While this is tricky with something like leather vampire gloves, cleaning them as best you can and using antiseptic wipes is essential. Also, after play you should treat any break of the skin like you would if someone was injured. Clean it and keep it clean.
The truth is, *** play does have risks involved, so it's crucial to educate yourself about what those risks potentially might be. Put plans in place to hopefully mitigate them or even eradicate them. It's also vital for your play partner(s) to understand what they're consenting to and be comfortable with any potential risks.
Finding a *** play playmate is an integral part of exploring this kink, although perhaps exploring *** play on yourself would be a good idea to start. You'll then have more experience and confidence about what you like and why.
When it comes to finding a partner, my advice is to look for a connection or bond with someone so that you can talk openly and freely about the things you like. If that person is right for you, they'll hopefully be willing to explore those things.
Indulging in *** play with a causal partner perhaps isn't something you'll do because of the risks involved. The way to go would be to develop a relationship with another kinkster. That being said, some communities enjoy vampire role play that doesn't necessarily involve actual *** - this could also be another place to start.
One way to find other like-minded kinky folk is to attend a local munch. A munch is a social gathering usually held in a bar or a pub where you can hang out and chat and get to know people in your local kink community. It's not a place to hook up with people, but a place to discover a community and the kink events taking place in your local area. Attending a *** play workshop would be a brilliant way to educate yourself. Who knows what other ***y folks you might meet there as a result.
Good luck
Molly x
Have *** play ideas? Share your tips with other kinksters into *** play in the Fetish.com forum.
For tips and advice, contact Molly via her Fetish.com profile or visit her thread in the BDSM Forum.
Cover Image: model released from Shutterstock.com
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