I agree having more than a word is essential. When I go to subspace I forgot to breath never mind be able to actually say a word. I have 2 safewords and 2 hand signals. One is to communicate am reaching my limit so tread carefully and second is stop
You could go as far as three to confirm all ok, Read more… especially when exploring new things

From this conversation, @FET admin a how I like to be approached section on profiles would be well received

Just caught up on the comments, and seems I wasn't clear enough . I never said everyone thinks am fair game just the assumption. However for the comment "fetish site, so makes all about sex" "naive " is what I assumed this topic was created for and people's opinion, not a narrative of trying to Read more… control others
I am not of a mindset this lifestyle is about sex, a tool of a dynamic but not the objective .
While you reserve the right of your opinion that it is about sex, and many others. I would read a profile and see this and respect this, regardless of it being what ever site
When it's clearly stated on mine not to "hit me up " (as wording used) I also deserve that same respect and it's not ok when that line is crossed. That's not naive, nor is it someone else afraid to step out of comfort zone. It's being respectful

Also nothing beats connecting with community face to face, local events or chat rooms

Submissive guide podcast

A really great topic, I was lucky enough to have a mentor when I started my journey. An experienced sub, while not same type, her advice and guidance was invaluable to the emotional journey. I am no where near an expert but I have replicated this support with others as newbies
I really want to Read more… create a mentor community for both new subs and doms to match with experienced ones to support journeys

Such a complex topic, I think as their isn't a tick list for a Dom (and shouldn't be) not all vetting fits all. You may need to define what you see as a Dom personally, we all likely have differences here. Some may not like doms using honorifcs straight away, or being demanding, while others Read more… don't
Once done that clearly state on profile. Then biggest red flag is likely if that's ignored . From my interactions, anyone who approaches me with sexual intentions immediately, shows lack of control like becoming defensive or worse abusive, who adapts their likes and limits based on yours, pushes for meet I wouldn't likely continue
As most have said, safety is paramount so don't be afraid to chat for what ever timeline you need, ask questions , verify. Make sure someone knows where you are if do meet and have a plan to exit if necessary

Or dominant enough is personal preference... Like saying not tall enough, pretty enough, funny enough. Doesn't mean your not xx for the right person. If we where to be the perfect type for everyone.... Wouldn't that be easy
However I am surprised at use of word rape... ? It's the legal word for Read more… non consent actions. Same then could be said for describing impact play as assault.
Surely a line needs to be drawn

I am so glad you brought this up, this is one of my consistent conversations .. what tick list of attributes, skills, experiences meets label of a Dom, how does that also align with expectations multiple subs types and their opinion of what a Dom should be.
While slightly off topic to your Read more… frustration in self proclaimed labels.
My Personal opinion is a need for change of terminology. I am not keen on labels but perhaps defining more the ambiguous term of sub or dom would actually be helpful
For example
Do you consider self Dom or sub because like/want BDSM sex ... Xxxx type
Do you label self as Dom or sub because your into the bigger picture and part of lifestyle outside of bedroom too
Are you fully into sub/Dom 24/7 so are xxxx
Into switching so xxxx version of a Dom

Is it just me or has others found some of these replies worrying. I don't remember signing up to a hook up site, and automatically being fair game and assumption of hooking up. Is it 2024 and a time when we can dare to connect with other like minded people without judgement or assumptions of Read more… anything else. I debate it's not the site but perhaps mindset of some that may have misunderstood the objective of this community.