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Subs - How Do You Like To Be Approached By A Dom On This App


Mr****

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Posted
Just a message on something about the profile or whatnot and if you want even further a couple of questions etc etc
Posted
I'm not a sub, however I'm going to go out on a limb and say this....everyone is different and going to have different ways they like to be approached. The best thing to do is to read their profile and see if they mention it at all.

Other than that the best approach imo, is to start it off like you would any normal conversation.
Just because someone is a sub, does not mean that they are your sub.

Unless they specifically say they want otherwise, you can't just immediately start acting like you control them or anything similar.

Ask them questions. Get to know them.

Make sure to listen to what they're saying and if they aren't showing interest, then don't try to *** anything.
Posted
Just open the line of communication with a simple hello. Don’t be aggressive or assertive at first. ‘Hey, scrolling through and your profile caught my eye’ does wonders
Posted
Hi Benjamin_G-
I can tell you from experience I don’t want someone to immediately question “how submissive” I am. Or tell me I’m not a proper sub because I won’t…(whatever)

Ideally something about your experience/time being a Dom. What type of training - casual bedroom or high protocol. Are you super strict or more relaxed. Do you want scenes or are you looking for something physical and/or relationship based?

I don’t mind different approaches as long as they are respectful and appear to be leading somewhere.
Posted
like i’m a human being with feelings like anyone else lol
Posted
Don't be creepy af. It's a turn off. You want open communication. Everyone has a different line that piques interest. It is not a 1 line fits all. As stated above, show you read their profile. That said not much is in mine since I'm new. However even that can lead to a healthy line of questioning and therefore conversation.
Posted
Oh oh I’ll give an example that I think would be nice!

“Hey, I’m ____ and I’m a ___ (i.e. Dom, Daddy, etc.) I think you’re lovely and like your (kinky) bio .I’d love to get to know you more!”
Posted
As long as it’s a not a message from an obvious bot, any approach is better than no approach
Posted
1 hour ago, randomsarcasm said:
I'm not a sub, however I'm going to go out on a limb and say this....everyone is different and going to have different ways they like to be approached. The best thing to do is to read their profile and see if they mention it at all.

Other than that the best approach imo, is to start it off like you would any normal conversation.
Just because someone is a sub, does not mean that they are your sub.

Unless they specifically say they want otherwise, you can't just immediately start acting like you control them or anything similar.

Ask them questions. Get to know them.

Make sure to listen to what they're saying and if they aren't showing interest, then don't try to *** anything.

This^^^^ As a sub it pisses me off to get messages in my DMs from doms demanding things in their first message. It’s an immediate block from me. Don’t be creepy, be respectful, subs are humans with boundaries not a robot meant for purely your pleasure

Posted

I appreciate the f**k out of this question lol I hate when Doms try to Dom me before we've even interacted. "I want you. Come here and suck me off like a good slut" like bitch, I don't know you. In what world are you deluded enough to think this would work? Its nasty and abrasive. And I don't feel cared for or safe....

Posted
Just don't be super creepy with your introduction, don't just say hey either, tell me who you are, what you are, what you're looking for, and where you're from, I'll respond if I like your profile. Also, if my profile clearly states everything I'm into, and you don't fit into what I'm looking for, there's a good chance I'll visit your profile once and never respond. Respect those who arent interested and leave them be.
Posted
I personally like them to start with some small talk before getting into anything else.
Posted
I’m new to this but I know for sure to not go psycho on intros
Posted
Direct but not curt. Respectful and confident. Like :

“Good morning, I trust you are well. i read your profile and was suitably impressed. I am here to find a good positive connection with a submissive, if you would like to explore this please let me know. “

They have to have good spelling, grammar, a sense of authority and authenticity.
Posted
I would like to answer this from a dominant point of view I myself prefer to get to know the person that I'm talking to because that way I will find out if they are a good fit for me or not so I will more often than not start off with small talk hey how are you I hope everything is going well something of that nature to open up other conversation and if they respond fine great if they don't well I guess they're not interested which is also fine too
Posted
I'm an academic and don't care much for ritual. Respect is easy enough to understand. If not, things tend to fall support quite naturally. Not making assumptions is also a big one; I try to let a person show me who they are though words and action before I make a judgement.
Posted
It's really quite simple, regardless of whether they are dominant, submissive or switch, man, woman, TV etc - approach them as you would anyone else, with respect and courtesy, show a genuine interest in them the person.
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Doesn't have to be war and peace, but nor should it be a couple of words - keep it simple, introduce yourself and why you are contacting them, and invite them to take a look at your profile and get back to you *if* they are interested in chatting some more.
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Never assume or take the position that they are dominant or submissive or whatever, treat them as an equal - which is just what they are at the point you are contacting them.
Posted
The obvious way is respectfully
Get to know me as a person. No kink. A bit of banter. Show me you've bothered to read my profile/read something I've posted.
Give me something I can respond to.
Short. Concise. Fun.
Posted
For me , and from me perspective as an inferior to all females , I would be more than happy with just a simple Hi
Female dommes aren’t supposed to spend effort on their approach, they would only need to a knowledge the presence of the slave , and leave the rest of the work for their servants

This might not be the case for other subs or slaves , but it is for me

Posted
🚫- Affectionate terms as if you’re already in some kind of relationship, dynamic, or something - only makes you seem like a creep or someone who doesnt really take bdsm seriously.
Posted
Firstly on any contact I’d like them to have read and taken note of my profile and if they have things they do that are things I don’t do - for instance poly / non monogamous, then I’d rather not have contact.

After that, as others have said being respectful, an invite maybe to read their profile. And bit of info about them but not too much.

I’ll be honest that I struggle with online and can’t lead a conversation, so if someone comes to me with a hi, I will struggle to be able to reply and build a rapport, where as if someone comes to me that is confident in their message and gives me something to bounce off I can do it much easier - but I get that’s a me problem 🤣
Posted

The difference between this site and other ‘dating’ sites is that in general there needs to be a mutual ‘like’ of each other’s profiles before communication starts.

it’s worth keeping that in mind when contacting anyone in here. Just because someone has viewed your profile they are not necessarily giving an indication that they have any real interest in getting to know you.

 

therefore I think it’s always best to work on the assumption that you may not get a response or a response that you want. 
 

the best approach I’ve found is to treat the person as a person and behave the way you would in real life. 
 

there’s no magic formula I’m afraid. Everyone is an individual so you should treat them as such.

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