Oh dear ! I don't come on here very often anymore but had to comment.
Mine I'm afraid would be Mitzi Gladstone after my toy poodle when very young and the street where I was dragged up.
Then why not approach Mistress Strap-on! After all, the Lady is in the South and will maybe oblige when (if) this bloody awful virus has eventually done one.
No hair here ! Can't stand the stuff ( not on me anyway.