The Dominant submissive

[CopperKnob]

She's not for everyone.

She won't obey.
She won't ask permission.
And she won't stay...unless she wants to.

This is going to be a difficult concept for some given a recent thread but, yes, some Dominant Women can desire domination and no, that doesn't necessarily mean that they're switchy.

It won't look like you think.

I am dominant in day to day life. I have an emotionally demanding and stressful job where other peoples lifes/livelihoods depend on what I do. I'm making significant, by poxy decisions for those that can't and where I need to, asking a Court to make a decision when mediation hasn't resolved a contentious/challenged decision.
I was raised to be independent. My friends and family have come to expect me to be the one who know's what to do and then do it. I'm the person they turn to when things have gone wrong. I run a household and have living beings to keep alive each day (with the exception of the houseplants).

In short, I don't suffer fools gladly, I don't tend to take any 💩 and I can run my own damn life.

And yet, I do find myself yearning for submission. For surrender.

Not just my body. But my MIND.

An older, wiser Dom once told me, that his favorite "prey" were dominant women, because for them submission isn't a way of life, but rather a choice to surrender power.

The same Dom also put into words what I could not:

"For her, domination begins in the mind, in the darkest fantasies she would not dare tell lesser men. Let her tell you. Let her trust you. Facilitate those dark unspeakable fantasies and watch as 90% of the work is done for you."

Considering the propositions in my inbox, I can promise you that 99% of the Doms who offer their "services" fail miserably at even receiving a response from me.

Because when they hear "submission/submissive" they immediately think of some poor little thing tied to a St. Andrews Cross begging for mercy.

And when that does not become their reality, it frustrates them, and all they want to do is break the unbreakable.

But enslaving a dominant submissive won't make you a Dominant.
And breaking her won't make you worthy of that title.

She's not for everyone and that's just fine.

Because when she is in need of Domination she needs a man who is calculated and clever, who is smart enough to know better than to break his toys.

A man who isn't intimidated by her. Who doesn't need for her fire to be diminished for his own to rage. Who knows the key to her submission lies not her in subjugation, but in her freedom.

He knows how to be her safe harbour, and also the devil on her shoulder. He knows how to make her tremble with the softest of touches, and how to melt her with his words.

He knows her choice is precious, and so only he shall know the honour of being chosen.

[Char__]

Lovely writing. Very relatable.

*Cough* have you found any of these Doms...? Asking for an friend who tends to intimidate 🤣

[lolli-leigh]

beautiful and reminds me of why I am with my Sir x Thank you

[nomore007]

I believe , Punishment swats are in order for miss dom sub

[ge****]

Beautifully written and spot on as usual CK though personally I'd take that one step further and apply it to the majority of submissives regardless of how they are in day to day life or to an extent their gender (though I acknowledge many male subs may drop to their knees at the merest click of a dominant's fingers) - capture and captivate the mind and you capture and captivate the body.

[CopperKnob]

13 hours ago, Lady_Char said:

Lovely writing. Very relatable.

*Cough* have you found any of these Doms...? Asking for an friend who tends to intimidate 🤣

I haven't Char but, if I find more than one I'll let you know. Not in a pimpish way at all, that is 🤣

[CopperKnob]

9 hours ago, gemini_man said:

Beautifully written and spot on as usual CK though personally I'd take that one step further and apply it to the majority of submissives regardless of how they are in day to day life or to an extent their gender (though I acknowledge many male subs may drop to their knees at the merest click of a dominant's fingers) - capture and captivate the mind and you capture and captivate the body.

Definitely, I like that saying. If you have the mind, you will invariably have the body too

[Deleted Member]

For me it's no fun if the girl is submissive all the time, kind of takes away the excitement of tying her up and getting her to orgasm. 

Edited June 13, 2022 by Deleted Member

[Ro****]

I absolutely love this post. Totally identify with what you have said about the demanding job, being in control of day to day life etc.  For me, my absolute escapism is to surrender control but in a safe environment.....  Thanks for sharing your thoughts, insightful as always :-) 

[Sengdroma]

I completely relate to everything that you said. I’m in a high pressure job, so relied on by everyone in my life & never get a chance to switch off let alone ask someone else to step up (yeah I know I can do a better job than them  so that’s why I never ask) even though it is mentally exhausting.

To me the games start in the mind, the banter, the flirtation, the tease before I’m pinned down while I look at them in dis stane before we wrestle to be top dog (while I’m secretly wanting them to over power me into a relaxing submission).

 

[TeeterVonD]

I agree with this completely. Well said 

[Puppy6411]

Quote

On 6/8/2022 at 6:31 PM, CopperKnob said:

A man who isn't intimidated by her. Who doesn't need for her fire to be diminished for his own to rage. Who knows the key to her submission lies not her in subjugation, but in her freedom.

He knows how to be her safe harbour, and also the devil on her shoulder. He knows how to make her tremble with the softest of touches, and how to melt her with his words.

 

Exactly this.
So unique and elusive to find your other

[sl****]

I love this so much!

[al****]

I'm so glad I've read this. I'm similar to this, I've had to be independent and strong in my own life and as a result, I can't submit quickly and simply. Part of me needs to know that they are able to take control, that they are strong and intelligent enough for me to pass it to them so I can submit and free my mind. Thanks for a beautifully written post

[Catsailor69]

CK this is a very rich sharing of your self and understanding.
As a Dom I always tell a submissive to be who they truly are. A puppet submissive isn’t all that much fun. A puppet has too many strings to keep pulling and becomes difficult, like trying to heard cats…lol
I’ve always enjoyed submissives who shine in their day to day lives. They make me proud of them. In my own way, I’ve found them attractive and alluring yet, I am always uncertain just how to initially approach them, even knowing that they desire, in their time and choosing, to let go and accept their submissive desires.
For those that I have had some interaction with, it’s been most like being the anchor for a cat. They go about doing their own things and choose to come to me when they choose and desire attention and petting, seldom welcoming advances for myself.
When they do desire attention and submission, they are such a joy and enjoyable experience. Their energy adding a rich experience for us both.
Yes, as you’ve said, not for everyone and not what you would think it would look like. But definitely, unique and interesting.
Good post and an enjoyable read.

[CopperKnob]

7 hours ago, Catsailor69 said:

CK this is a very rich sharing of your self and understanding.
As a Dom I always tell a submissive to be who they truly are. A puppet submissive isn’t all that much fun. A puppet has too many strings to keep pulling and becomes difficult, like trying to heard cats…lol
I’ve always enjoyed submissives who shine in their day to day lives. They make me proud of them. In my own way, I’ve found them attractive and alluring yet, I am always uncertain just how to initially approach them, even knowing that they desire, in their time and choosing, to let go and accept their submissive desires.
For those that I have had some interaction with, it’s been most like being the anchor for a cat. They go about doing their own things and choose to come to me when they choose and desire attention and petting, seldom welcoming advances for myself.
When they do desire attention and submission, they are such a joy and enjoyable experience. Their energy adding a rich experience for us both.
Yes, as you’ve said, not for everyone and not what you would think it would look like. But definitely, unique and interesting.
Good post and an enjoyable read.

A 'puppet submissive' interesting analogy.
I will say though that I have a cat and rather than herd him, i taught him his name. He now comes when called, sits when asked and kisses on demand. Don't get me wrong he's still a little 💩!! 😂

[Lo****]

I somehow missed this before. This is exactly how I feel and what I feel I need. I want to be someone’s challenge, I want us to earn each other … to be worthy of each other. It feels like a pipe dream. 

[CopperKnob]

29 minutes ago, Lockfairy said:

I somehow missed this before. This is exactly how I feel and what I feel I need. I want to be someone’s challenge, I want us to earn each other … to be worthy of each other. It feels like a pipe dream. 

And, for me, to be challenged. We can dream. It's out there somewhere I swear

[Lo****]

32 minutes ago, CopperKnob said:

And, for me, to be challenged. We can dream. It's out there somewhere I swear

Yes, that as well. 

Hope springs eternal … 

[sl****]

May I share this on my fetlife with credit to you as the writer? It really resonates with me.

[lolli-leigh]

I can confirm that there are Dom/Dommes out there that fit us. Keep looking and don't settle for less. I am truly blessed to have found my Sir @JamesRiley1

[ED****]

I can resonate with these responses exploring how to progress further such dilemmas & take any ‘rage’ to transform any relationship further: ‘safe in my arms-devil on ur shoulder, whispering, touching ur needs’ ! Keep this discussion/thread going perhaps ?