Sadists: are you hot tempered? Does doing bdsm calms down your nerves?

[Deleted Member]

Basically, yes. It's a vent.

[ur****]

3 hours ago, BrumDomSir said:

I made a mistake & should of said -

A sadist shouldn't just get satisfaction from hurting a sub/masochist, they should get satisfaction from the pleasure that *** gives the sub/masochist. 

But I couldn't edit it after I realised my mistake as I'd logged out. 

Thanks for the clear up. I Def agree.

[Nocturne]

This is one of the particularly interesting questions to answer for me, I think.

Personally, I found sadism extremely soothing, having a specific schedule for it made me feel particularly at ease and my sub relished in asking me to save up all of my frustration to take it out just on them.

I however, don't feel anger easily. Frustration, irritation, sure, but it takes time to get to the point where I'd want to take it out on something.

If a sub is to brat more than usual, increased *** would be a consequence of the 'dance' involved in the dynamic, not my emotions, given I don't let my emotions decide how harsh I will be.

If my sub requests me to, I might vent my feelings while performing sadistic acts, but it's not something I expect. 

As others have said, it's likely a result of Domspace and Domdrop, the rushes of chemicals and the depletion of them during and after a scene.

I'm glad that you are so conscious about this and are examining your reactions and actions, as we all should. 

Have a great day, I hope that you can find the answers you seek.

[Cade]

I feel a commonly overlooked component in S/M is intent. The sadists's intentions have a tendency to bleed through the play being endeavored. If my intent during play is "angry, hostile, trying to burn stress", I find my partner receives it as punishment, not pleasurable. If my intent is "fun, sexy, trying to share an intense experience", then my partner receives it as pleasure, rather than punitive. So, for me as a sadist, fixing my intent to my desires outcome is vital.

[Ae****]

Perfectly normal. Unmet need for safety, control, assertion, would result in a person who is sadistic. Causing *** provides sense of safety and control. Day to day general emotional sensitivity and *** of fully expressing frustration and inability to process it will cause a build up of internal rage - sadism will provide a release for these emotions.