Molly's BDSM Tips | Curious about Penis Torture?

Pondering about penis torture? Bursting for some ball busting? This week, our BDSM columnist Molly, responds to a Fetish.com member who is curious about CBT (cock and ball torture) and would like to know more about it, so our Molly shines a light.

Dear Molly,
I am super curious about cock and ball torture. I have tried to do a bit of research into it and struggled to find a good guide to it. I would love to know a bit more about what exactly it is and how you go about doing it?
Curious C

Dear Curious C,
As you've asked, I'm going to assume that you have some basic knowledge of what CBT is but just in case, let's start with a straightforward definition.
 

Quote

"Cock and ball torture (CBT), penis torture or dick torture is a sexual activity involving the application of pain or constriction to the penis or testicles." Wikipedia

CBT can take the form of all sorts of different activates such as wax play, spanking, squeezing, pinching, clamps, flogging, tickling, urethral play, bondage, and electro-stimulation. Penis torture can range from reasonably gentle sensation play to some fairly extreme pain play and, as with many BDSM practices, has the potential to cause harm, so it's vital that participants know exactly what they're doing to try to minimise those risks.
 

About submission and penis torture

CBT is often associated with male submission and female domination, and while penis torture is a common form of BDSM play for people in those types of relationship dynamics, it's most definitely not exclusive to that. Just because someone enjoys CBT or some forms of penis torture, it doesn't mean that they are submissive, and even if they are, it doesn't mean they are submissive to women. Some people maybe switch, and some people might not identify as submissive at all, but enjoy elements of CBT either with a partner or even alone when masturbating.
 

Where to start with CBT?

If you're entirely new to penis torture, then you are going to want to start slowly and with some simple things so you can begin to identify the things that you do or don't enjoy. Do not start with something potentially risky like urethral sounding, as that is something that you need to learn how to do, and also you want to try some less intense play to see how you feel about it.

Examples of play that you might want to think about starting with are sensation play, such as using ice or feathers to stroke and tickle, or maybe something slightly sharp to try scratching. Wax play is also something you might want to consider but be careful of wax and pubic hair; otherwise, you might find yourself having an unexpected waxing session to remove it.

When starting with CBT, it's crucial that you spend plenty of time talking with your partner(s) about the things you might or might not be interested in doing. Likewise, if you're the person who will be administering the experience, again, it's essential that you talk things through your partner(s), agree on boundaries, and the things you absolutely will not do, things you have done before, and the things you're interested in trying.

It is also important that you talk about how you will decide if and when you want to stop. Consider having a safeword in place for this or use the traffic light system (with green meaning 'everything is OK,' orange signifies 'it's OK to carry on, but it is fairly intense,' and obviously red is stop.)
 

Expanding your CBT skills and knowledge

Once you've started to explore some elements of penis torture, I advise you to look around and see if you can find any workshops or learning opportunities in your local kink community. There are often peer learning events and kinky workshops like Kinkfest in Birmingham, UK, where you can go to expand your knowledge and learn new kink skills so that you can then develop the type of play you do, safely.  Also learning with your partner(s) can be an enjoyable and bonding experience.

The most important thing as with all BDSM play is to learn to communicate well with your partner(s) about what you do and don't like. Do plenty of research about elements of play, particularly those that are potentially risky and reach out to other more experienced practitioners within your community to help guide and teach you. Be open to learning, and you'll find your way to pleasurable CBT fun.

Good luck!
Molly x
 

If you’re still begging for info on penis torture, read more about CBT in our magazine.

For tips and advice, contact Molly via her Fetish.com profile or visit her thread in the BDSM Forum. 

 
Cover Image: model released from Shutterstock.com