:1790797289,1123037,
If 5” were the average 50% of the penises out there would be less than 5”.

Is that true?

Not quite. The median is the point where you can make two groups where half are at or above, Read more… and half at or below. Although the word "average" is normally used to refer to the arithmetic mean - the sum of all measurements divided by the number of measurements - in this case the figure is probably the median.

To illustrate the difference: the median net worth for a US household is $192,900, but the average (arithmetic mean) is $1.06 million due to extreme outliers like Elon Musk. However, unlike Elon's extremely hung stock portfolio, there is no man with an outlier dick that is 2,000 feet long. :)

:1790782898,4662374, I’ve been struggling with feeling unattractive to women too. Whenever I see a woman saying a man is physically attractive it’s almost always when the guy is either in top tier physique, the conventionally attractive tall, dark, handsome type, or they are Read more… hung.
We see all different types being desired by men—look at dating apps and how women will have endless match opportunities but the only guys I know who have the same experience are the aforementioned type described above.
My current partner says she finds me attractive, but I struggle to fully embrace that because my type is very rarely ever pointed to as desirable or hot or sexy, etc.
For me, it’s hard not to feel like there are physically desirable/attractive types of men and then the rest who are all lumped in together. It’s hard to feel hot when you’re being told you’re desirable for the same reasons someone you feel is a lot less attractive than you, someone who puts no effort into their looks, and the thing that makes you more attractive than him is the fact that you have a good personality. Makes me feel no better physically than any other guy, like I’m just as attractive as the least attractive guy, the only thing separating us is personality

Ever hear the saying, "Beauty is only skin deep?" Ever hear the longer version, "Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes to the bone?"

Think of this: those physically attractive guys? Tall, hung, good-looking face? Just what did they do to get any of that? Not a damn thing. Luck of the genetic draw. Keeping in shape, maybe some credit for that, but even there genetics plays a part.

Personality, on the other hand - that is something you do have a choice about. An ugly personality - that does indeed go to the bone. So if a woman tells you that she wants you for your personality, something you DID have a choice about instead of something that (plastic surgery aside) nobody gets to choose - for heaven's sake, take some well-deserved pride in that!

:1790771560,6516002, Oh and PS: the example response to the insecure chubby woman being a BJ seems like something between an oversight and a straw man to me once you factor in the actual list of sexual benefits a plus sized woman can bring, including but not limited to softer Read more… surface, stronger lower core and thigh muscles, deeper penetration potential, higher shock absorption, just more tits and a** etc
Not trying to proselytize here but using a „don’t worry you feel awesome“ instead of the BJ example could have deepened the overall argument by highlighting this too is not a binary discussion

Bingo. Sexual intercourse is a _tactile_ pleasure, not a visual one. In the missionary position, how much of your partner can you really see even with the lights on? But you can feel all of that body pressed against yours. I have a plus-sized partner (met on this site!) who likes "cowgirl" position. There, I do get to watch - and simply seeing her in wild abandon enjoying herself is breathtaking. But in addition to that, I love feeling her on top of me and fondling her plump breasts while she bounces on top of me. Yum!

I put a more positive spin on it than just being useful. To me, "It's how you use it" encompasses the idea that paying attention to her reactions, adjusting your s***d and *** to build her excitement, and unselfishly holding back on your own orgasm to make sure she also gets there are all things Read more… that don't become unnecessary just by having a big tool. A man who selfishly concentrates only on his own orgasm, rushes to blow his load, and leaves his partner unfulfilled is not a rare complaint from what I've seen. And as others have already pointed out, while there are size queens who really love being filled by a fat 8+", there are many small women who would find that actively ***ful.

As for @cyclop5's comment on "tiny dick energy" - I simply hear that as dismissing them for acting like a big dick (in the offensive personality sense) to compensate for their own insecurities which in many if not most cases do not literally stem from their own equipment size.

I don't even like the filter photos such as *** faces that make no pretense of being genuine. Digital alteration to make yourself look better is even worse. And really, on a site devoted to kink interests, I'd think that would be less necessary than on a vanilla dating site. Yes, all other things Read more… being equal, eye candy is nice. But if I want someone to tie me up, looks don't translate into skills.

I firmly believe in putting any potential dealbreakers in the profile. For some people, your situation will be a hard limit, whether for religious reasons or prudential ones (e.g., worries about a husband _violently_ disagreeing with the idea that the marriage is over). If you were to hide it, Read more… you'd be wasting both your time and theirs entering a conversation that will end abruptly once the situation is revealed.

:1789173038,7693869, Unfortunately I am a woman with a VERY empty profile because I recently stepped into a leadership position with an organization…

I don’t know it feels like a safety thing and I just get nervous. I’m on this app maybe once or twice a month hoping I’d find Read more… somebody I have interest in and feel comfortable enough to open up to.

I know I’m responding to like .5 of your OP but

Raahhhhh :(

At least you've filled out the BDSM questionnaire, which is more than I can say about a huge number of profiles I look at. And as I commented elsewhere, your forum participation shows up in your profile as well, which also helps to show you as a real person. (Granted, in the case of some people, what that participation shows does the opposite of helping them.)

:1789868132,6988105,
The problem is when a woman has an empty profile that's acceptable when a man has an empty profile it's acceptable to ignore him like there's no effort to get to go in with empty profiles
Read more…
Acceptable to whom? Dude, if you want to go chasing after women who have completely empty profiles even after a full week on the site, nobody's stopping you from messaging them. Your time is your own to spend as you see fit. If many turn out to be timewasting catfish, well, you can't say you weren't warned. I have different criteria, and it's my right to not bother initiating contact with women with empty profiles. If one messages me with something other than a stupid canned icebreaker or something that clearly indicates a non-native English speaker despite a profile claiming otherwise, I give them one chance to tell me what they're looking for and why they thought I might satisfy it.

I don't know who needs to hear this, but all discussion participation shows up in your profile. If you feel you're being summarily judged by women, part of what you're being judged on is what you've said in discussions. You might want to engage in some serious reflection on what kind of image you're presenting to women in your ever-growing and not at all empty profile. Just saying.

:1789041198,6129420, You have a point, but don't close the door fully or you could miss out on something good, you dont want all the fishes in your tank at once or do you???

The problem frequently voiced by women is that too many male Read more… fishes jump into the tank whether wanted or not - even when there's an explicit statement about exactly which kind is wanted. Since fish - um, sorry, I mean people - have only a limited amount of time, having to do extensive research to check out each fish is also likely to miss out on something good simply due to lack of time. At the very least, the fishes that clearly identify themselves as the wanted type go to the front of the line.

BLUF: I like it.

My one suggestion is from a standpoint of literature rather than erotica. The one very small change I'd make: "The pace turns frantic" should be "Our pace turns frantic." The first paragraph is not yet settled as to who is being addressed by the writer - us, the readers, or only Read more… the writer and the writer's partner. The second paragraph plants the flag: the use of second person shows that we readers are mere voyeurs. The words are focused on the writer and the partner, not on any outsiders. The change from "The pace" to "Our pace" serves to keep consistent with that framework.

This may strike you as an odd question, but: did you conceive of this as prose or poetry?

:1788641215,6957840, Most ppl are here for kinks and for desires not here to find a good healthy relationship go to a different site if thats what ur looking for smh women cant be serious lookin for there forever here not saying it cant happen or its not there but be Read more… realistic

Even if all you're looking for is a kinky play partner, not a soulmate, it still makes sense to fill out the BDSM profile and kink interests so that the rope bunnies and riggers can more easily recognize each other, ditto the spankers and spankees, etc.

:1788712277,8015942, I am new here and tying to get my profile going. But ibam have a bit of a time navigating this app. It was not letting properly search my phone for photos. Any suggestions of ways I can improve my profile to show the reality of being a save person? I am Read more… not here to loke "live out my porn preferences" I am here to explore my sexuality with other humans who can meet me where I am at.

If you're having trouble adding a photo through the app, you might have better luck with the website version. While a photo certainly helps, you tell people much more about yourself through your words. And I see you are doing that. You have the BDSM profile filled out, and while your profile is lean, your participation in this and other discussions shows up when your profile is viewed. Showing yourself in that way to be a thoughtful person who makes constructive comments can also contribute a lot to achieving the goal.