Someone may be a submissive, but they are always a person first.
If someone is not willing to acknowledge that you have concerns and trauma then they will not be safe for you. You need to be allowed to heal and finding someone who will at least take the time to listen even if they do not Read more… understand is important.
Unresolved trauma can cause the fight or flight instinct to come to the forefront. It is our mind protecting us and it is normal behavior.
This is just my suggestion of what to do when you feel like this. Splash your face with cold water and do some intense exercise for 5 minutes. Inhale through your nose for a count of 4, exhale through your mouth for a count of 6 then tense a muscle group like your arms and relax. It may sound strange to do, but it is a dialectical behavior skill to help relieve stress.

Scammers are easy to spot on this site. They will demand you call them mistress or master immediately without showing they have earned that respect. If they can't give you an actual physical location of their "dungeon" then it is fake. They also try to put contact info on their profile, though now Read more… they put it on a profile pic. Even though it is against the terms of service, this site doesn't seem to do much about it either.
There has been a kinky ad looking for "pay pigs" for several days and this site still has yet to remove it despite being reported multiple times.

:1782769500,7608138, I need help with 17, 23, and 24

23 and 24 are not released yet.

I would recommend a SMART goal. SMART stands for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, and Time-Bound. So let's say you want to start walking. Your goal is to eventually walk 5 miles a day, 4 days a week. You wouldn't start with that but that work up to it in increments. For the first week Read more… you only walk a mile for 4 days. Do that for 2 weeks then move up to 2 miles and so on. You could do this with any goal but remember to keep it a SMART goal. You can look it up online to learn more.
As for meeting new people, you may need to learn to love yourself. Sticky notes on your bathroom mirror to give yourself positive affirmations to remind you daily that you are worthy of respect, dignity, and love.
Sometimes we need to start with really simple suggestions to move forward.

Plagueis_wise has some wonderful ideas. Finding a mistress on Fet that has experience in this area may be a good mentor for you. She may also be able to help with any negotiations between your husband and yourself since she should be neutral and objective in this situation. This way both people get Read more… their needs met. A couple should be willing to make a compromise with each other. The idea that you should just separate is some of the problem that couples have today. They think separation is the only way and do not even bother with communicating with each other about the issues that are going on. Communication and trust are a big part of a BDSM relationship. A kink friendly therapist may also help you learn more about each other's needs.

If you choose to try counseling again you may want to try this site which has kink aware professionals.
https://www.kapprofessionals.org/