Kinky Lifestyles

Kinky Lifestyles

CG/l stands for 'Caregiver/little', and is a gender-neutral catch-all term for many of the relationship dynamics found under a certain portion of the ageplay umbrella. Perhaps the most widely discussed of these dynamics is DD/lg (Daddy Dom/little girl), but all possible variations exist and identifying as a caregiver or a little is not bound by sexual orientation or gender identity! Some people enjoy incorporating the accoutrements of being 'little' into their play, such as pacifiers or colouring books or childlike clothing. Others simply enjoy the dynamic and fantasy, without wanting so much to express their littleness outwardly. CG/l sometimes comes alongside AB/DL, but there are significant differences between the two communities and the fetishes are not quite the same thing!
'Crossdressing' is a slightly archaic term these days, though some people - usually those who identify definitively with one binary gender but enjoy wearing the clothes of and playing the role of the other for social, sexual, personal or performative purposes - find it one they identify with more than any other. Drag kings and queens are often thought of as crossdressers, as are transvestites - though be very careful when describing someone as a transvestite, as while some crossdressing people self-identify that way it has been used as a slur often enough that it's a word best avoided unless you know someone likes it.
Gothic culture is primarily about fashion and music, but it crosses over with the fetish scene in a few ways. For one thing, gothic dress and fetish wear can be quite similar; many people who are a member of both subcultures wear the same outfit to events on either side, and it's not always possible to spot the difference! Another link comes from the way that social subcultures tend to work. If someone is already perceived as being a little unusual in one way - because they're a goth, because they're kinky or because they're queer, for example - they're more likely to be open to the idea of exploring other unusual hobbies and cultures. This means that your local goth club and your local munch probably have a broadly similar clientele!
There are a lot of great things about sharing erotic photos of yourself online. It can help your own self-confidence, it can turn yourself and your chat partners on, it can add a sense of realism to kinky exchanges or cybersex scenes and it can be a lot of fun to do. It's important to be careful, though. Make sure you understand the risks: these photos can't be entirely taken back once they're out there, and unscrupulous partners could use them in ways you weren't expecting and didn't consent to. Only share shots of yourself knowing these risks, and if you're not happy to take them it's best to keep your pictures to yourself!
Pornography isn't always visual. For many people, the hottest porn of all is to be read rather than watched - and erotica is huge business. There are plenty of specialised publishers putting erotica out, so whatever your tastes you'll be able to find erotica that works brilliantly for you. Just don't be afraid to shop around a little before finding an author you love - everyone has their own style, and there's something out there to get you going if only you can find it! Have a look through some free samples to find an author you like, and then see if there are any other authors they recommend as similar to them.
Here at Fetish.com, we've written before about the joys of sexting and cyber sex. Done anonymously with strangers online, it can be a wonderful way of exploring your kinks and figuring out your boundaries before taking the risk of translating things into real life. Used as part of an already-existing relationship it's an opportunity to spark up a little passion, keep things boiling over and help you feel connected to each other. If you're in a new relationship, these sexy messages will help you figure out what they're into and make the sex you have when you're physically together better than you could have imagined.
Originally, the 60s concept of 'free love' centred around the idea that monogamy was unnatural (especially for men) and that everyone should be free to act out their fantasies. This was a great idea, but it came with some drawbacks: for one thing it wasn't a feminist movement in the way we'd expect now, and for another it was mostly put to bed by the AIDS crisis. That's not to say that free love is dead - far from it! Swingers, polyamorists and non-monogamous folk of all types are still upholding the best of the principles of the original 1960s trailblazers - it's just that now we're doing it with more feminist ideals, awareness to sex-positivity and a much better understanding of safer sex.
Polyamory, which translated means 'many loves', is a kind of open relationship in which people have more than one partner at a time. For many, these relationships are serious and ongoing, with a whole lot of love in them - after all, love is not a finite resource. It's not that people who consider themselves polyamorous don't feel jealousy or conflict, but that they choose to deal with those emotions in different ways - by dealing with them rather than by stamping out the cause of them. While many kinky people and fetishists are also polyamorous, polyamory isn't a fetish; it's a lifestyle choice and a relationship orientation.
Literally meaning ‘the husband of an adultress’ a cuckold is someone whose wife/long term partner is having sex with another person, often another man. It’s been used for years as an insult and is currently ‘cuck’ is over used by alt right men against men who support feminism etc which is a very wrong way to use the term. A cuckold in fetish terms is a submissive man who enjoys seeing his wife/Mistress/partner having sex with another person. It’s a type of erotic humiliation that can go hand in hand with all kinds of other fetishes like female domination for example.
Humans have always made, consumed and loved pornography. There have been plenty of arguments about it over the years - who it's bad for, who should be able to access it, what its connotations might be - but ultimately, what's clear is that it's a fundamental fact of the human condition and it isn't going anywhere. The answer isn't to try and stamp it out, particularly not as for many people it's a healthy form of sexual exploration and self-expression; what we need to do now is work together as a community to create new, inclusive, ethical porn that's as hot as hell to boot.
For most nudists, nudism and kink couldn't be further apart. The idea behind nudism isn't to sexualise nudity but to desexualise it; to make it an ordinary and freeing part of daily life. That doesn't mean, however, that nudity in and of itself isn't a fetish for many! A lot of BDSM clubs have areas in which people can be as naked as they like, and many club-goers find it not only a hot turn-on but also a liberating way to cut loose and relax. Of course, nudist venues are a stalwart of porn no matter how far that fantasy is from the truth! Just remember that while these scenes can be hot, they're not a good way to behave in real life--expecting a porn set is a good way to get yourself thrown out of a nudist beach or nude spa ASAP.
Swinging is another form of non-monogamy, though one that looks at the question from a very different perspective to polyamory. Swingers tend to be in serious, stable, primary relationships and have occasional sex with other people who are also in those relationships; the primary couple is considered the most important thing of all, and the theory behind the extra-marital sexual relationships is that they're 'a bit of fun' without too much romance or a lot of intense emotions. Of course, in practice swingers often form wonderfully intense bonds with their other partners; human connection is what it's all about, after all!
For as long as there have been artists there has been erotic art. Photography is now the most common medium for such images, but it's been done in everything from cave painting to collages. It's sometimes said that the difference between 'naked' and 'nude' is how artistic it is - and while that might not be true, it's certainly the case that erotic imagery can have creative potential. Here at Fetish.com, we love exploring the boundaries between the erotic and the artistic, which is something the BDSM community has enjoyed for decades.
Of all the many kinds of pornography available online, hentai is one of the most misunderstood - and one of the most vilified. It's a type of animated porn originating in Japan, and everything in it tends to be highly exaggerated; the women tend to be tiny and youthful, while the men are built and muscular with remarkable fantasy-land penises. The plots are no less fantastical, complete with everything from tentacles to violent rape scenes. Non-consent fantasies can be healthy, enjoyable parts of a person's sexuality, but it's vital to keep a line between fantasy and reality and always have consent at the forefront of your mind.
It's very common for someone to fetishise the idea of sleeping with someone who is drastically different in age to themselves. This is usually associated with the Hugh Hefner stereotype, but there's no need for that to be the only way it's perceived; plenty of people prefer a partner with a little more experience, and that goes regardless of gender orientation or sexual identity! This is sometimes part of a kink, particularly if associated with something like DD/lg or other sexualised role plays, but for many it's simply a matter of to whom they tend to find themselves feeling attracted. A significant age gap can introduce an interesting power dynamic to any BDSM relationship, which many enthusiasts find is a fun added bonus!
Not everyone who prefers their partners to be a little older than them is looking for a Hugh Hefner stereotype. Plenty of folk prefer their partner to have a little more experience than them, and there are loads of fetishes (such as Caregiver/little or Owner) that thrive off a bit of an age gap. The important thing is to make certain that, no matter what your sexual dynamic, in everyday life you're on the same level - power differentials are hot in kink terms and potentially abusive in everyday ones! Keep in constant communication, treat your partner as an equal outside of your dynamic and enjoy all the age gap relationships you could want.
Partner swapping is the concept behind the classic 'key party', with the idea being that two established (and probably otherwise monogamous) couples swap partners for a single encounter or night. For some this develops into a more ongoing and polyamory-like arrangement, while for others it's just a little fun to help them change things up a bit and maybe explore some of your hitherto unrealised fantasies. There's more than one way to get involved in this, but for most a swinger's club is the easiest place to start. Check out our events sections to find out which clubs are near you, and make sure you're in fantastic communication with your partner before you begin!
Threesomes aren't the be all and end all of more-than-two sex, foursomes and moresomes are also common in some fetish clubs and sex-positive social circles, and sex involving four or more people is often referred to as 'group sex'. There's more than one form of group sex - there's the gangbang, for example, where a group of people are all focused on one individual, and there's the orgy, which is more of a free-for-all. People of all and any sexualities and gender identities can enjoy group sex in the right context, and it's a great way to live out some of your deeper and darker fantasies. Safer sex is even more important in group situations than it is in most others, as there's a far higher chance of picking up something you didn't want when you have more partners at once. You should also have consent negotiations before, during and after--it's vital to make sure that everyone is happy, comfortable and on the same page.
When someone describes a threesome as being 'FFM', they're usually indicating that it involved two people who identify as women and one who identifies as a man. This is a common fantasy for a lot of bisexual women, a lot of straight men and a lot of other people besides! Featuring in lots of porn, this is a fantasy that people love to revisit time and time again. If you want to make your FFM threesome dreams come true, you’re in the right place. There’s lots of kinksters on fetish.com looking for threesome fun, chat about it on the forums or start a personal ad to make your fantasy reality.
When someone describes a threesome as being 'MMF', it’s an indication that two of the people involved identify as male and one is female. It is a common sexual fantasy for all kinds of people and features in all kinds of porn. Threesomes offer all kinds of opportunities for BDSM fun. You can have two tops dominating one bottom or one top with two submissives. It adds a little extra to the fun you could have just as a couple. Often established couples invite a third person into their scene but threesomes but it doesn’t always have to be the way. You can do it any way you like, if you fancy bringing a threesome fantasy to life, give it a go!
The 'classic' gangbang situation is one woman being fucked by a group of men at once. It's likely to involve double or triple penetration and sometimes ends up with some pretty intense cumshots. There are plenty of variations on the theme, of course, people of all sexualities and gender identities can enjoy a good gangbang - but the core concept is a whole group of people all concentrating on having their way with a single sub. Many BDSM fans find that this is a common and highly enticing fantasy, particularly if they're into the idea of sexual humiliation.
It's never been easier to make your own porn - and thousands of people all over the world have started doing just that. While some choose to experiment with it as a way of making a little extra cash, this is risky and difficult to get right - most people choose to keep their homemade movies to themselves, to enjoy on a future occasion or share with another partner. As with everything, honesty and consent are key when you're playing around with home movies and erotic film. Make sure everyone involved in the recording knows they're being recorded and has agreed to it, and make sure they additionally agree to anything you might go on to do with that recording - be it showing it to someone else or posting it online. If you don't get consent, you could be breaking the law as well as behaving like an asshole!
Tantric sex - an Indian practice originating from the writings of the Kama Sutra - is not usually associated with fetish or kink. In some ways it's almost its opposite: tantra focuses on gentle touch, slow movements and equal bonding. That doesn't mean that the ancient sexual arts have nothing to teach us, though! Time spent working on sensation and intimacy can do wonders for the bond between a dominant partner and their submissive, and who doesn't like the idea of achieving the fabled "hour-long orgasm"? If you're interested in a little exploration, it's worth seeking out a professional teacher. There's plenty of information available online, make sure to check out the yab yum position and the tantric chair. Finding a teacher who has learned the traditions in the traditional manner is however essential to really get the best results.
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