Can you be vanilla and kinky?
Simply put, vanilla is the opposite of everything we're about here at Fetish.com. That doesn't mean it's a bad thing, though - quite the opposite! All kinds of sex are fantastic for the people who desire them, and the best way to run your sex life is exactly how you and your partners want to.
It's also important to bear in mind that just because someone has kinks and fetishes doesn't mean they never want good old vanilla sex. Sure, there are those amongst us who need a little kink all the while to keep it feeling good - but there are plenty more who crave a little vanilla every now and then and find the experience one that promotes intimacy and builds trust.
What is vanilla sex?
Often called conventional or traditional sex, it’s basically all the sexy stuff you do that doesn’t count as kinky or part of a fetish.
Is vanilla sex boring?
Not necessarily! Sex is awesome, right? And sometimes you just want some straightforward shagging. Not everyone feels kinky all the time and that’s perfectly okay. Enjoying sexual touching, without power dynamics and pain can be just what you want sometimes.
Can you be kinky and have vanilla sex?
Sure, sometimes you want a complex scene with all kinds of psychological depth, power play and pain exchange. You want to get out all your toys and use them in fun, wicked ways. However some days you just want sex. It’s perfectly fine to be kinky and enjoy a bit of vanilla sex from time to time. Variety is the spice of life after all.
My partner is vanilla, I’m kinky, will we work out?
It’s down to your own, personal dynamic. Relationships are all about communication and you need to talk to your partner about the expectations you both have for sex and sexual interactions. It might be that your partner wants to try out some kinky things, you can explore those together! If not, it is your place to decide if vanilla sex is enough for you or not. There may be options for you to get your kink and fetish place elsewhere with a different play partner. You need to chat and work out what is best for you.