for me, that mindset isn't so much about controlling your partner, but that you know and feel "in your heart" that they NEED you to guide them, and I am helping them. whether they are your puppy, or your brat, or the submissive in bed, the mindset for me is that I'm guiding them where they are Read more… unable to think clearly for themselves. Benevolence that sometimes needs discipline to correct their path that only I can see clearly. I am guiding you but I'm not babying you. you WILL understand the direction and the guidelines I'm laying down for you, even if it requires a cold distant hand or the warm sting of my palm, I will help you achieve what you cannot see for yourself. You don't need to understand the why, only that I know what's best and so you should listen and not question. I look at you as if to say "oh you silly thing, why are you still questioning me? I'm doing this for your own good".

for me, that is the general idea of the mindset. but what you two are trying to achieve or your boundaries is completely dynamic towards the situation. for example, telling you what clothing you should wear because only I know how attractive you are in it. but a lot of times it's not something that's out in the open it's little things like putting your hand on their lower back and guiding them to sit in one chair instead of another. softly correcting them verbally when they make their own choices.

however you wish to execute it, the sub should always have the triggered mindset of "thank you, I was obviously being silly for not listening" or "they must love me so much to be guiding and helping me" or "I feel seen and appreciated from their strength"

if the sub cannot be triggered in that way then the Dom obviously isn't triggering her properly. as silly as it is to say that! that is why experimentation on both the DOM and the sub are very important because those specific triggers need to happen. Hope this helps in some way. ;D

oh, And if anyone else has anything else to add or they wish to correct feel free to collaborate!