Submission

Bondage and subservience - discover everything about submission

Submission - ready to serve?

Submissives get off on giving away their control over themselves: on being directed and compelled, on following orders and losing agency. Some like to do this through bondage and physical restriction; some by feeling psychologically subservient to a dominant partner; some through pain play. Many like a combination of these things. The key to figuring out a fantastic D/s dynamic is communication--make sure both sides of the equation are getting what they want and what they need, and that everyone is well aware of safewords and limits.

Some people enjoy having dominance and submission as part of their everyday relationship, while others prefer keeping it in the bedroom. Either of these kink styles is fine - just so long as everyone is on the same page.

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How to try submission for the first time

Submission is a conscious choice to allow someone else to take control over you in a situation. If it isn’t a choice and agreed upon, then it’s abuse, pure and simple. The most important thing is to discuss what you want up front and be honest.

Most of the time it’s a good idea to start out with a bit of orgasm control or a simple role play - for example, a naughty sub needs a spanking because s/he didn’t do what the Master/Mistress said. Or throw a bit of subservience into the mix. A maid or butler must serve the Top and do whatever they command.

Next important step is to pick out a safeword. If you want to play with gags, then find a non-verbal safeword that will work for you. The dominant partner will be in control of the scene. Make clear how long the scene should last and discuss aftercare for all parties involved.

If you’ve got a special kinky idea in mind, talk about it with your partner(s) and see what you can work out! It’s all about communication and building trust.

Bondage play to be a better submissive

Bondage plays a prominent role in the dominant and submissive world, but not all bondage is ropes and chains. It is also a large part of mental control as well. No one way is better than the other, it must be discussed between the partners, what are the expectations, desires and limits.

Depending on your kink rope bondage can be a massive turn on. Or maybe you need to be sat in a corner and told to play with yourself, but you aren’t allowed to cum until the dominant says so. Remember, sometimes the talk first is the best foreplay!

You can use many different materials to bind a submissive. Naturally, rope and chain spring to mind, but you can also use leather, rubber or latex and plastic wrap. You could pervert some everyday items like scarves, neck ties, belts and stockings - just make sure you have safety scissors nearby in case the sub needs a quick release - so never use something you’d be sad if you had to cut it up!

Combinations of physical restraints and mental bondage also make for a good submissive practice, but these require a lot of knowledge about the person you’re playing with, the equipment you’ll be using and a good safety system. Always check in with your partner(s) and make sure they are happy with the scene - physically AND mentally. Take care of each other after and talk about it! Remember SSC & RACK!

A Dom/me wants to push my limits of submission. What should I do?

There are 2 kinds of limits in BDSM play, soft limits and hard limits. Soft limits can be pushed, they are things that you’re not sure about but you’re happy to try as long as it stops straight away if you aren’t happy. Hard limits shouldn’t ever be pushed. Ever.

Sometimes limits change. As you grow and evolve as a sub, you may find you enjoy things you didn’t think you would before. But it’s always your choice to downgrade a hard limit to a soft one.

D/s play does often push limits by its nature. If you feel safe with your Dom/me, then letting him push your limits is a good thing. If you don’t feel safe or you feel it’s not something you’re comfortable with doing then don’t do it. The decision is always yours.

A good Dominant will always respect your decisions and only push those limits you allow them to.

I’m submissive but don’t like pain. How do I make this work?

There are many ways to play with control that don’t demand pain at all. Orgasm control for example is very much an expression of Dominance and Submission without any pain being used at all. Completing tasks, looking after a dominant and letting them command you to kiss their feet/undress for them/masturbate for them are all wonderful ways to play with your submissive nature without the need for pain. Punishment, if you want that, can come in the form of lines, sitting in the naughty corner or not being allowed treats like orgasms again, pain doesn’t have to be part of the play.

Threads and discussions that include: Submission

  • Is it? . Or, re you acting out someone else’s definition of submission because you read what submission is in romance novel? . Are you imitating someone else's version of submission because it's w ...
  • Good day everyone. I've been thinking and wondered if all you beautiful people would weigh in. When it comes to feminization do you look at it as a form of submission or strictly as a kink? Does the ...
  • I know that I want to explore my naturally submissive side in my dating life. But I feel like I’m the experienced one sexually - especially when it comes to kinky desires - which makes me feel like I ...
  • Members looking for: Submission

    I am open to approach from possible doms for my use, service, ongoing bratty submission and dating relationship.

    I currently have an amazing playpartner/protector who I switch with (not often as I dont tend to dom much at all)

    What I offer:

    Experience

    • Honesty
    • Openess to new things withing my personal limits.
    • Everything is negotiation so I can meet your requirements and needs as my superior; Including rules and conditions or even a contract if wanted.
      -Meets organised at suitabke times and potentially mine as and when im able to
      Pleasure - Full use of my body
      -A smi high *** threshold - masochist
      -Willingness to learn ( if there is anything i am a brat)
      -An extensive wardrobe and dungeon

      Ideally my dominant will be:

      • between the ages of 26 and 40, male white ( sorry bbc isnt for me 😕)
    • seeking real life submission when with my dominant and am open to their needs.
    • have good experience in kink and a good basic understanding of bdsm ( we are always learning after all)
    • within an hour and a half drive of my location, Plymouth. ( I do not drive and can't travel)
    • open to me having poly type dynamic as I do have another playpartner whom is also My carer in vanilla life)
    • realise that my health will come first
    • understand I'm a private person and keeping personal things between myself and them.
    • All would naturally be open to full discussion and I’d seek/request a social meet/coffee etc before any commitment to ensure this is correct for both and clear any questions.

      Happy to discuss My health issues more in depth if need be in private chats.

      Respectfully

      Sub_sparkles

    BDSM Play Partner26 to 40 years ● 25km around UK, Plymouth 17.03.2024 - 13.04.2024

    More D/s than BDSM.
    Years of sensual creativity and exploration, a desire to share my experiences while learning about yours.
    Communication and interaction get us to that perfect place, where it all begins.
    I have a wicked sense of humour, a vivid, kinky imagination, and love to travel.
    Just looking for that one special submissive, or more, who relates.

    Read between the lines, there is always more.
    Introduce yourself, if you see common ground and interests.

    I'll be back in London, for April.

    The Equalitarian Dominant is one who controls by teaching, mentoring and leading. This Dominant feels and knows that when they find a comparable submissive that things will happen as a progression of the interaction. Usually, just a mention or short learning situation is necessary to obtain a certain interaction. Both the Dominant and the submissive "get it,” need very little, so called "training" and naturally know what the other needs after interaction. This Dominant does not like the situation of constantly repeating and forcing a particular behavior (submission) to occur. It is not the activities but the surrender as the result of the Domination that is the objective and enjoyment. Creativity is an important part of this situation. These are the more intellectual, into the philosophy/psychology mechanism of this lifestyle. They understand the concepts and resultant interactions and can put it into real life. They do not need many "rules" like the Democratic type, nor do they like the heavy S&M activities; preferring submission to occur as a result of an instilled desire in the submissive to surrender. She "wants" to as a result of the Dominant's knowledge and skill at Dominating. Sensuousness is the rule and is given and received as a form of sensuous stimulation. Light as opposed to severe. Sensuous *** is a popular activity in this area. Both the Dominant and the submissive must be naturally this way. These are the ones who claim to be born this way, have always been this way. They fully understand the concept of D/s - it comes to them naturally and easily. They attract a submissive who truly and naturally wants to please, and who will observe and sense what the Dominant is communicating; and be able to translate that into the right thing to do. The doing or saying without having to be told type. The submissive begs easily and surrenders sweetly. They understand the concept of respect and surrender and can make it happen after initial learning with little or no additional instructions. They embrace the surrender gratefully and lovingly. These individuals usually form the most intimate of relationships, the closest. There is not much downside to these relationships, because they not only grasp the concepts, but can make it happen too; and their attraction is based on strong mutual respect. Their strong relationship is not readily apparent to the unobservant, but they are always subtly in the 24-7 mode. The fact that these things come forth naturally and without the need for orders or rules are a great affirmation and source of pride, satisfaction and loving. Just as the strictness and forbearance without the need for orders or rules of the Authoritarian/Totalitarian situation affirms pride, satisfaction and loving.

    Kinky Date28 to 65 years USA, Denver 03.04.2024 - 26.04.2024

    Keywords related to Submission

    Keywords: sub, role play, d/s,

    Similar to Submission

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