Photos

Status

Not single

In a relationship with tanew

Personal details

Gender Man
Age 44
Status Not single
Height 188cm
Body shape Average build
Eye colour Brown
Hair colour Brown
Hair length Short
Beard 5 o'clock shadow
Orientation Bisexual
Ethnicity Caucasian white
Origin England
Body hair Some hair
Zodiac sign Virgo
Glasses
Smoker
Tattoos
Piercings

About me

Interested in:

I’m looking for:

Description

When it comes to sex I am a secret, sensual, sybaritic, seraphic, striking, seductive sadist, delighting in degenerate, debauched deviancy.

I thrive on the darker, more adventurous and daring side of carnal delights, with many years as a Dominant (more than all my adult life). Love to explore and experience as much as life has to offer. To tease and expand my partners limits (or with the right partner completely obliterate them, but that is more than most can contemplate). I have almost no limits in what I can enjoy with the right person (I play to other people's limits) but the mental side of things and finding my partner's mental triggers is what really excites me. Where you can tease someone to the point of complete, body trembling, mind numbing, exhausting arousal. By touch, talk, tease, stimulation, excitement, a tinge of fear, triggers or any other tools that can be utilised. Tying someone so every sense is heightened, every sound sends quakes of anticipation through every atom, every touch causes tremors to run right through you. And for those that are a little more daring the more extreme side of things.

I love taboos; sexual humiliation, role play, hypnotism. But again not everything works for everyone. It's all about finding the things that work between you, and the spark between two people is paramount. Even the most 'tame' of things can be amazing with the right person, whereas the most erotic of things can fall flat with the wrong one.

Outside of the lascivious, lecherous, lewd, libidinous, licentious, and lustful joys of life I like to think I am fairly intelligent… possibly ever so slightly pretentious, creative, witty, and companionable but all of that is subjective and obviously I'm biased so you'll have to make up your own mind. Similarly I get told I am attractive but that is for others to say. I am self confident and have been blessed with full and well rounded life to this point. And importantly, in spite of my alternative tastes I am safe, sane and pass for 'normal', keeping the depravity hidden behind my eyes when not appropriate (though it is fun to have that frisson of 'if only they knew').

So if you feel bold and brave, or rash and reckless then please email and let's see what fun we can find together.

My places

Fetish.com gives you…


Fetish.com is like an appetizing smorgasbord in Guildford with lots of hot guys to meet up with. Have a look around first if you prefer to see who’s around, or if you know what you want, search by selecting the right category "Kinky Dating”. Nobody stays alone here for long! Fetish.com has tons going on!

DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside wrote something in the forum
  • 28.02.2024 5:17:28
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
Wanted vs Needed

It’s better to be wanted without being needed than needed without being wanted.

LikeYour_Owner-9673 · Jump to discussion
DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside wrote something in the forum
  • 21.02.2024 1:00:25
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
But, it is your version of submission?

This isn’t meant to be confrontational because I actually agree that we should try to be as aware as possible in all aspects of our lives but there is no possible way we could ever know every possible “input” into the decisions we make. However, we should always question, both ourselves and others, Read more… so I think I still agree… wait… that may be my parents speaking.

DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside wrote something in the forum
  • 29.12.2023 2:25:15
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
Abandonment bondage

Ok… just to say that this is common. There are ways to do it safely. Blindfolds, ear plugs, sensory deprivation. The person can be there monitoring the situation the entire time, but… you don’t know that, at least not for sure. The mind is an amazing playground. Now a caring Dom would never want Read more… something to go wrong for their sub, and even an uncaring one wouldn’t want to deal with the aftermath of something going wrong, but it’s amazing what can be done with a planted seed.

DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside has bought a Premium-membership!
  • 22.12.2023 17:43:44
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside wrote something in the forum
  • 25.11.2023 3:47:39
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
Did I dodge a bullet?

One thing though, it does not make you a failure. You know what you are good at. If someone brand new in your field made mistakes or didn’t do something perfectly would you judge them a failure? Or would you try to help them understand? Now from what I have read I don’t think you did anything wrong Read more… anyway. But even if you had why should you be expected to know something you had no experience of.

DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside wrote something in the forum
  • 25.11.2023 3:37:29
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
Did I dodge a bullet?

I think you have your answer there.

DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside wrote something in the forum
  • 25.11.2023 3:33:19
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
Did I dodge a bullet?

As a general rule no. These should be as a rule fundamental basics of BDSM relationships. There are people who specifically do not want these for various reasons but should only ever be entertained with full understanding of potential risks and pitfalls and acceptance of what that might entail.

LikeAngelbaby865 · Jump to discussion
DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside wrote something in the forum
  • 25.11.2023 3:24:11
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
Did I dodge a bullet?

I think the upshot here isn’t whether you dodged a bullet or not. I think the main take away is you know what is right for you and how this didn’t match up to that.

LikeLisaanna113 · Jump to discussion
DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside wrote something in the forum
  • 25.11.2023 2:51:44
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
Did I dodge a bullet?

Ok there are a number of things here. From the sound of things you never agreed to enter into this. He decided you should. There doesn’t sound like he have any consideration to your circumstances or real life priorities or necessities. It also doesn’t sound like there was clear communication on Read more… what was expected or desired. He said he was good with “those sort of problems” but without knowing what those are I would ask if he has actually shown that he has any consideration of them or not. He hasn’t given you any idea what meeting will entail… so no discussion of limits? Safe words? Physical/mental limitations/triggers/limits(soft and hard)? Reassurance?
Has he shown any background or experiences that he knows what he is doing? Or that he actually understands what you want need?
Is it mutual?
Obviously I have no idea what connection you had or the messages shared but how much could have been said as something that could have been said as something you wanted to hear?
I don’t know these answers.

LikeAngelbaby865 · Jump to discussion
DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside wrote something in the forum
  • 18.11.2023 21:04:16
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
Love and The Dynamic.

Basically it has helped form the people that we are, and that’s the person I love.

DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside wrote something in the forum
  • 18.11.2023 21:03:08
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
Love and The Dynamic.

I find this a little hard to disambiguate. For me the dynamic is a part of our relationship. But so is enjoying their company, making each other laugh etc etc etc. Kink is a part of who I am, and the same for my partner, not just roles we play, but also not solely what defines who we are, as Read more… individuals or as a couple. So to imagine if the relationship would work without kink is trying to imagine if I wasn’t me or if I was different and so were they then would it work… I don’t know that I can answer one way or another.

DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside wrote something in the forum
  • 15.11.2023 0:46:47
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
Advice - Daddy cheated :(

I think without further understanding it’s hard to know what to advise. You said you are non monotonous. Was there a discussed understanding of what that entails for you both? Was it clear what you both needed and wanted and what the dynamic and boundaries were? What did the cheating entail and why Read more… did it hurt so much for you? There are sliding scales for all of this and people will find what works for them. As said above clear communication is key.
That said once trust is broken it is hard (but not impossible) to regain it. The amygdala/hippocampus will always play out worst case scenarios. So to build up trust again sometime it will take going over and above to prove trust again. And sometimes that is more than the person is happy or willing to do. Sometimes people are willing to forgive because what is there is worth it for them. It is always down to the individuals involved and what they are happy to accept or not.
This also plays into grief. Grief isn’t always about a bereavement, it’s also about any loss of hoped for or expected future. And all the stages of grief may or may not apply. Time helps, focusing on doing what you need to do for mental health generally allows the brain to process (endorphins, oxytocin, serotonin, dopamine) spending time with friends family pets etc, doing positive things for you, cathartic exercises (drawing, music, jigsaws, writing etc etc), exercise. All allow the brain to process and move forward.

LikeWoody3180, wannabeagoodgirl, Sir_Yvonand 2 more… · Jump to discussion
DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside wrote something in the forum
  • 14.11.2023 14:08:57
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
Love and The Dynamic.

But from personal experience all my relationships have been both relationship and dynamic intertwined. It’s never been a role just a part of the relationship, where the dynamic is always there but not always played upon. I’ve never felt the need to prove my dominance and don’t worry about if Read more… something fits the role… it’s just a part of the relationship, which also includes all the aspects of a vanilla relationship.

Likewannabeagoodgirl, Sir_Yvon · Jump to discussion
DeviantInside
icon-wio DeviantInside wrote something in the forum
  • 14.11.2023 14:04:35
  • Male (44)
  • Guildford
  • Not single
Love and The Dynamic.

Yes it is absolutely possible.
As to the other… that’s a rather more philosophical question and brighter people than I have argued over what love is and how to tell it apart…
(Resisting the urge to launch into a rendition of “if it’s love, and it really is, it’s there in his kiss”)

LikeStoryteller05, NaavaPhoenix, LaylaNessand 1 more… · Jump to discussion

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